How to change the dynamics of your dysfunctional relationship

Dysfunctional Relationships

This post is sequel to the earlier post on how to know if you are in a dysfunctional relationship. So you now know that your relationship is a dysfunctional one. The question is what do you do now? Would you end the relationship and find someone else or would you change the dynamics of your relationship?

The sane thing anyone would advise you to do is to end the relationship and move on but then it’s not always easy to walk away and start again. So if you’re interested in changing the dynamics of your relationship then here are 5 tips on how to start.

Tips for changing the dynamics of your dysfunctional relationship.

1. Observe the techniques your partner uses. You might be in a relationships with a dominating and manipulative partner. Take time to really observe how they do it. For instance a manipulative partner will make you feel guilty after hurting you by saying,  “but it’s your fault. You made me do that because you didn’t. … … ”

2. When you observe how your partner does it then that’s your cue. You need him to understand how you feel but talking about it won’t solve the problem so you deflect. You change the conversation to something else and watch his or her reaction. Deflecting can be a bit confusing for your partner.

3. By this time you should know your partner’s limits. So you turn the tide. Do exactly what your partner does that pisses you off. When your partner complains about your attitude don’t remind him that he does the exact same thing. Simply apologize and promise to change. Do it again and again.

4. Gradually you will find yourself on the offensive while your partner instantly becomes the defender. That’s when you should also begin to transition to the actual type of attitude you want to see in your relationship.

5. Remember that this is not a foolproof plan. If your partner is an unrepentant type then it might be the best time to walk away from that relationship.

Above all if you walk with God He will guide you on the right steps to take in your relationship.

Have a fruitful day!

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